#3734

Three Thousand, Seven Hundred and Thirty Four,

Dead in the Iraq War,

It’s not just a number anymore.

I called my mom earlier to discuss my impending Labor Day visit, and when she answered the phone she mentioned it was a rough morning. Considering emotions aren’t really allowed to be talked about in my family, I was pretty shocked. I naturally asked why.

But first, background. My mom works for a private school teaching Math. It’s an alternative school, where kids go if they failed a class or dropped out of school for various reasons and go back to get a high school diploma. She’s been working there since I was in Middle School….quite a long time. Tutoring and Teaching is something of our family profession (I’m the 3rd generation in education now.)

She told me that the front page of the paper brought grim news – one of her old students was killed in Iraq. She talked of how he would visit every so often after he graduated, so proud he was going to be a marine. He brought pictures in his dress uniform, he stopped by and brought pictures of his wife, and was just a good kid.

My mom sounded shell shocked on the phone – I hadn’t heard her like that in a while. I tried to cheer her up with news of good weight watcherness, but it was hallow. I can’t imagine if one of my students was killed, whether in war or in a car accident.

Three Thousand, Seven Hundred and Thirty Four,

Dead in the Iraq War,

It’s not just a number anymore.

As if dog fighting wasn’t already tacky…

Ok, one more quickie from work -

I’m reading all about Michael Vick’s dogfighting apology (I know it’s a minor news story, especially here in Atlanta, but still it warrants mention )

We have a quote, from this ajc article:

“We all make mistakes. I made a mistake for using bad judgement and making bad decisions,” Vick said. “Dogfighting is a terrible thing and I didn’t reject it. … Through this situation I found Jesus and turned my life over to God.”

I think this demeans Christianity…as somewhat of an outsider.  Michael Vick’s dogfighting, and doing his best to save his career and his butt from jail, has led him to find Jesus.  This seems soooooooo disingenous that it’s insulting.  He’s trying to desperately save what little of his reputation he has left by claiming to have found Jesus…in a dogfighting ring.

If you’re trying to make right by the City of Atlanta, Mr. Vick, might I suggest a different method?  Devote your life, money, and resources to a cause ala inner city youth, and become a national spokesman for PETA.  Then we might start buying it.

People aren’t perfect? – a quick post from work

So I had a realization today while at work – people aren’t perfect.  And I was shocked that I was shocked to find that to be true.

My assistant director is korean, and she speaks really, really poor English.  Whenever I hear talking English to a parent, or someone interested in the program, I cringe, because I know that if I were that parent then I wouldn’t enroll my kid at my center…because the people there don’t speak English.

Well a few days ago I asked my director, who speaks pretty good English for a Korean, to fax me something (I was elsewhere and needed something that she had faxed to the Corproate HQ a few days ago.)  She couldn’t find it, but did want to complain about something (shocker.)  Well, I asked the Assistant to find it today, and in no time flat she found it…even though she had no clue what I was talking about.  She knows the office and is pretty darn organized.

I was struck for a minute how I wanted her to be perfect at her job, but wasn’t.  I was mightily aggravated earlier in the day because of the whole English thing, but now am pretty satisified that she found what I needed.  I wanted her to be perfect. 

Then I got all meta for a minute – why am I expecting perfection from employees and coworkers, when I, myself, am [deep breath] not perfect?  In fact, I hate it when people either assume I am perfect, or expect perfection from me.  Yet I here I am, expecting it from others…and getting aggravated when it doesn’t come true.

I know I have high expectations…for pretty much everything in life.  I don’t want to lower my expectations…because that just seems soooo negative in my mind.  But maybe I need to lower them just a little, away from the unattainable perfection to just doing their best.  (Ah, but what happens when their best isn’t good enough?  The quandries of being a Unitarian Universalist Mid-Level Manager – an UUMMM – maybe I need to explore this idea further when I get home – how to be a mid-level manager while holding on to UUism)

Self-righteous spiritual practices

Today we talked about spiritual practices at my small group.  This thought of self-righteous spiritual practices popped in my head for no really apparent reason…the conversation certainly never went that way, nor did I get put off in any way shape or form.

But how many of us out there have heard UUs talking about their spiritual practices and gotten a little put off by it?  Is it just me?  I remember some lay leader of our congregation talking about how they went to some meeting and how they were asked if they had a spiritual practice.  She didn’t, and everyone was shocked about it, and told her she needed to have one in order to be a lay leader, or she was doomed to failure.

How could anyone be a Unitarian Universalist and *not* have a spiritual practice?!?  It’s insane!  You have to have a spiritual practice, or else, you very clearly aren’t a good UU.

It seems that there are a fair amount of people our there who are self-righteous about having a spiritual practice.

So I don’t always have a spiritual practice.  I don’t like traditional zen meditation, I don’t pray, I don’t read deep stuff very often (I’ve been hooked on Harry Turtledove’s books lately),  and yet, I still somehow manage to live a moderately ok spiritual life.

If anything, maybe the UUA should come up with a handy dandy booklet of possible spiritual practices.  Pick one that suits you.  Sort of fits with the rest of UUism if ya think about it.

Happiness at the corner of Peachtree and Peachtree Corners

I was sitting in traffic on the way to work, at the intersection of Peachtree Parkway and Peachtree Corners, and I started thinking about happiness.

What brought it on?  A few days ago I finished correcting the typos in my 1st real nanowrimo, 41 Sunflowers, the little story that could, I think, one day be published.  I wrote about a girl who I met online, who told me that she decided one day to be happy.  I was confused, so I asked for a little elaboration.  She said happiness was a choice, and she was choosing to be happy.  It stuck with me then, and for some reason on the way to work today I thought about it.  [And, yes, it was actually at that intersection where I hit...there really are that many peachtrees in the metro atlanta area.]

Is happiness a choice?

There are so many times when I’ve been depressed, and wallowed in it.  Too tired to get up out of bed, or to do anything other than read indulgences online.  Even went on generic prozac to try to fix it.  I’m out of that phase, but still not “happy.”

How could anyone be happy, when there’s so much badness and sadness in the world?  People are dieing everyday from war, from famine, from preventable causes.  People are suffering all over the world.  Global warming is going to kill us all, and the planet while we’re at it.  When I’m obsessively checking the news throughout the day, at least 5 times today, the headlines are all doom and gloom, the latest in a string of daily disasters.   Yet I’m horrified when I hear there are people who aren’t well informed, who aren’t watching the news 24/7.  How could anyone stand being ignorant of global problems?

I’ve seen ignorance as the number 1 evil in society, yet, is the adage true and ignorance is bliss?

If being exposed to the harsh realities of our shrinking society, and that causes pain and unhappiness, why wouldn’t I want to check out of knowing everything in reality.  Choosing ignorance over unhappiness.  Choosing ignorance over being a globally responsible citizen.  When I self-righteously criticize other people for being ignorant, and rally against it, am I criticizing the choice to be happy?  Yet being self-righteous and crizitie when people aren’t keeping up with the news isn’t making me happy.  It makes me even further sad that more people aren’t watching the news or angry about my issue of the day.  I’m sad over the news, then I get sadder that more people aren’t paying attention.

We talked about that issue in a small group a while back, and I found myself agreeing with the thought that an ignorant happiness is worse than an aware sadness.  What’s more important….being happy, or being globally aware?  I haven’t met a terribly large amount of people who are happy and in a state of global awareness.

Is happiness a choice?

How many times have I said, “I’m not an optimist, I’m a realist.”  Can I choose to look at a situation that just sucks, both globally and in my life, and instead of getting angryand/or sd about it, actively choose to be happy?

*Is* happiness a *choice*?

Bah

Why haven’t I posted in such a long time?  Work.  workworkworkworkwork.  It’s back in a cycle where it’s sucking up all of my free time, and when I finally get home I’m too tired to blog.  I gotta try to break out of it!

Kinsi’s first bachelorette party

Howdy from Savannah -

I’m here for my first, and quite possibly only ever, bachelorette party. It’s not that often when a guy gets invited to one of these things, but it’s my best friend. The plan is for some beaching tomorrow, then lunch somewhere fancy, then miscellaneous bachelorette party stuff, followed by a ghost tour of Savannah then a trip to a drag show.

On the way I stopped all over south Georgia, and a visit to Ocmulgee National Park (pictures, and stories, to follow)

shoot me now

My boss assigned me a book to read that he thinks will help me, especially with the whole judging people thing.  I’m fine with this, and I’ll read it.  I definitely want to get better.  But.  Butbutbut.

The book -

“How to win friends and influence people.”

oiy.