Excerpt from this year’s NaNo

So I was looking back through some prior posts and saw that I had posted an excerpt from last year’s NaNo attempt.  So I ought to do the same this year.

This year I wrote about gay teen suicide.  The title is “Suicide: An Act in Three Parts.”  The first part deals with the individual gay teens, second part deals with the community reaction, and part three (if I had gotten it written) would have dealt with following the gay teens into heaven.  I actually plan on finishing this one, editing it, etc.  But here’s a raw, unedited snippet.  (I’m not posting some of the more emotional scenes.  Maybe later, but it’s still too…raw.)  This is interestingly…the only scene I wrote in 3rd person.  The rest of it is all in 1st.  Bad author, I know.  Anywho, here we go:

It was night time.  Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley was playing on his iPod stereo system over and over again, set to repeat just that one song.  It’s a cold and broken Hallelujah.  Something about that song just seemed to fit the mood of the evening.  It was cold.  The first real cold night they have had all fall down in Georgia.  Not cold enough to turn the heater on, it was only cold tonight, but cold enough to wander if summer was over and if they were in for a long cold winter.  Probably so.  This cold, this early…it would be a long winter ahead surely.
Turning to lay on his back, he heard a dog incessantly barking outside.  He hadn’t heard the dog barking before.  He assumed it was one of the neighbor’s dogs, but there was no way to tell for certain.  It was barking like it had been injured, pitifully wailing and howling into the cold dark night.  It was probably freezing after all.  It barked away, no one stopping to help or checking in on it.
On the wall, he saw the light of the street lamp outside his window shine through the cracks in his vertical blinds.  They made small vertical lines of light, but for some reason one of the parts of the blind seemed smaller than others.  The spaces of light on either side of the hidden blind were wider, and it looked like physical bars.  It was a windy night, the wind was blowing in the cold air, and he could see branches from the magnolia tree outside his window swaying in the breeze.  They would make shadowy patterns on the wall as the branches moved to block some of the light from the sole streetlamp illuminating the darkness.
The bars of light started to remind him of a prison.  They were all around his bedroom, bars of light in the darkness.  But it was like the light was keeping here in the darkness, the light was keeping him in this dark cold prison.  The light was keeping him from escaping the darkness, and he knew that couldn’t be true…could it?  Could it be the light that was keeping him here in the cold darkness?  He pulled the comforter closer to his chest.  It was so cold.  Such a darkness, such a dark time.
He quickly turned over and buried his head in his pillows.  He didn’t know what to do.  The more he thought about it, the more he looked at it, the brighter the bars seemed holding him in the darkness.  The only way to escape was to go to sleep.  He had to escape it somehow.  A solitary tear was quickly absorbed by the pillow.  Not tonight, he thought, not again.  He’s cried enough already.

One response to “Excerpt from this year’s NaNo

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention Excerpt from this year’s NaNo | Spirituality and Sunflowers -- Topsy.com

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